FOR THE LOVE OF FILM: Resident Evil: Retribution

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For The Love Of Film is UTG’s newest creation from film nerd and lover of all movies Justin Proper. Sometimes you need some help to figure out how to enjoy movies, and we are here to help! No longer will you need to fear movie night because your friends have no taste in film. With this column you will be able to love even the worst gems to ever grace the silver screen.

Movies based on video games are a funny thing. Sometimes they do well, but most of the time these movies are awful. Things get lost in the translation from game to movie and everyone watching suffers, especially when Uwe Boll is directing. Video games are hard to relay in a 90 minute film. Even short games last 4 or 5 hours. Every once in a while, however, these movies work. I recently saw the latest installment of the Resident Evil movie franchise, and I loved every second of it.

Pictured: Uwe Boll showing his respect for source material.

Resident Evil: Retribution picks up right where the last movie in the franchise left off. The plot is pretty complicated (and by that I mean ridiculous) so I’ll just give you a brief synopsis. The movie is about Alice, who is a bad ass zombie killing girl who is either wearing tight leather or nothing. She kills zombies, rescues people, tries to stop a giant corporation (that created the zombies in the first place) and does everything else you would expect an action star to do. The movie ends on a cliffhanger (just like the one preceding it) so there will be another movie in the franchise sometime in the next few years.

Everyone knows you need at least 5 unnecessary straps on your outfit to properly kill zombies.

Critics love to hate sequels. They love to hate Resident Evil sequels even more. This film was panned for bad acting, a terrible plot, and for just being more of the same stuff as the last few movies. Also, it was in 3D, which I personally find to be a stupid gimmick these days instead of something that actually enhances the movie. Other things that were found to be bad about Resident Evil: Retribution was the sheer amount of characters that you are supposed to care about. Not only did they add new ones in, they brought back some characters that had been previously killed off in the franchise.

Hollywood Logic: More characters = better movie!

I’m not going to say that those complaints are not valid. They totally are. That does not automatically make this movie not worth seeing, though. They first key to enjoying this movie (and the other ones in the franchise) is to immediately forget about the video games. If you want something that is cannon, go play the games. This is a whole different monster. The movies take inspiration and characters from the game and put them in a whole new situation and story.

Zombies now come in giant ax wielding form.

Once you get past that you can start to enjoy the movie. Do not expect to be moved by emotion or plot. Just enjoy some awesome zombie killing action. There are some amazing fight scenes in this movie and if you are too hung up on the plot you really cannot enjoy them to their fullest. Really, they could just call this movie Milla Jovavich Kills A Bunch Of Zombies and it would be just as successful.

Now they are unundead. Reundead? Redeadened? Whatever, she killed them for good.

Another thing you can enjoy about the movie is the setting. They are trapped in the bottom of the ocean in a secret base that is also a testing facility for the Umbrella Corporation (which makes the zombies). That is already pretty absurd, but it gets better. Inside this facility are scale models of major cities. There is a few blocks of New York City, a few blocks of Tokyo, a few blocks of Moscow, etc. So not only do you get to see a bunch of zombies die, you get to see them die in more than one major city. That does not sound like that big of a deal, but when you see the contrast from a small suburban town infested with zombies to Moscow roaming with Russian military zombies (complete with machine guns!) you start to understand how entertaining different settings can be.

In Soviet Russia zombie shoots you!

The bottom line is this: you are either going to love this movie or you are not. If you like zombies and action then it will be a great source of entertainment for a couple hours. If you do not like zombies and action, why are you watching this in the first place? Feel free to follow me on Twitter and leave some comments about some “bad” movies you want me to watch.

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